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The Musings of a True Oddball
Bethany: Act Two- A Chance Encounter 
Friday, July 25th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
I'm Batman.
This has been sitting on my hard drive since... March, I think? Maybe April? I'll have to check my chatlog. (I just checked, we did this on March 2nd. Wow) Anyway, I did this with Anna back then, and I just found it. Here you go!

It's the middle of June, and we're in Target buying things for the trip when we run into Anna. This can only be expected, as we live in the same neighborhood and all, but we're also here getting things for the ceremony, and we don't really want anyone to know. We try to avoid her as long as possible, but we've just left the clothing department when she finally spots us and comes over. Hopefully she doesn't notice what's in the cart.

"Bethany, Elise!" she says, waddling over. "How are things?"

"Great! Just, uh, getting ready for our vacation and all."

"You're so lucky," Anna sighs. "Vacation and Emma's wedding.  You're going to be so world-traveled that it's not even funny."

"Yep, world travelers, that's what we are," I state, rolling back and forth on my heels, willing my face to not flush.

Elise, the lifesaver she is, cuts in with "And how are you? How are the babies?"

"The babies are definitely part Stewart," she laughs. "Kicking the crap outta me and causing pains in various regions, but the docs say they're both healthy.  Although, I have been advised NOT to fly, but screw it.  My friend's getting married and I'm not missing it."

"Of course not! Event of the year! And isn't it true that if the kids are born on the plane they get free flights for life or something?"

"I think that's just an urban legend," Elise points out.

"Buzzkill."

"Well, considering the fact that Mommy hates planes, I think it'll be the first and last time I'm flying unless it's absolutely required."

"Yeah, I've never really liked flying much either. Mostly because the pressure change makes my head feel like it's going to explode. My ears are awful."

"I'm just a chicken.  Michael's going to have to hold my hand the entire way there.  I'm totally scared of airplane-type heights."

"Well, having someone to hold your hand always makes things better..."

I zone out. Shit. Snap out of it!

"Uh, except juggling chainsaws."

Anna laughs. "Yeah, it's not a good idea to hold someone's hand while you're juggling chainsaws.  You risk losing said hand and making a mess of the flooring."

Juggling chainsaws? What the fuck was I thinking? Wait, I know exactly what I was thinking...

"Uh, so what are you doing out? Getting stuff for the wedding, like we are?"

She nods. "Getting wedding stuff, among other things.  Looking at movies and books and such.  My grandmother is dead sure that I'm going to end up on bedrest eventually, so we're stocking up now.  Mom should be around here somewhere.  I think I may have lost her in here..."

"Having never met your mother except on the phone, I wish I could help you. How long are you going to be an international traveler? A week or two? I don't think I've ever been away for an entire month, I have no idea what to bring. Any ideas?"

I'm rambling again. And gripping onto the cart for dear life. Why I think this will keep her from seeing the contents is beyond me.

"Knowing my mom, she'll find me.  She was always able to find me when I wandered off in stores as a kid, so why should adulthood be any different? Michael and I are probably going to be there for two weeks for the wedding and some vacation time, but then it's back to the city for us.  Bringing a camera, of course.  Take some vacation photos along with the wedding photos...make my little sister jealous."

I laugh. "Yeah, making people jealous is always fun. We're still planning out our travel route, where we're going to be at what time."

I am so glad that I'm a good liar.

"We'll be sure to share ALL of the pictures with you when we get back."

"Well, except the very personal ones," Elise chimes in, and we exchange a wink.

"She's great, isn't she?"

"She definitely is." A woman approaches, who I can only guess by the way Anna looks at her must be her mother. "Well, I'll be damned, looks like she found me after all.  I better get going.  Have fun shopping!"

"Okay, same to you! See you later!"

After she leaves, I finally relax, turning to Elise.

"Think she suspects anything?"

"With the way you were acting? Probably."

I must have looked terrified, because she laughed at me.

"Come on, let's look at shoes."

I grumble and follow her.

----

from: Bethany Edwards <bethanygilda@gmail.com>
to: Emma Harger <emma.harger@gmail.com>
We almost got caught today. We ran into Anna at Target (she's waddling like a penguin, it's so cute) and our dresses were in the cart! I kept trying to stand in front of it, then I realized she actually wasn't trying desperately to see what was in there.

Oh! The dresses. I'm sure you want to see them. This is mine, and Elise is going to wear this. We had an argument about shoes. She wanted something fancy, I could have cared less. So we're getting our own. Also known as white flipflops for me.

Anyway, less than a month until we're in Glasgow. Scary. But I can't wait to see you.

-B


from: Emma Harger
to: Bethany Edwards
Awww, Penguin Anna! I'll be seeing her waddle around soon enough. I think she deserves a nice pedicure before we stick her in the dressy shoes, so I've arranged for my "hen do" (as Gwen Cooper put it) to be a sort of spa day instead of a go-out-and-get-smashed day. I mean, you're totally welcome to do that, but you know I won't. I just want to get all prettied up and massaged and whatnot.

Oh those dresses are beautiful!! Good old Isaac Mizrahi always makes wonderful things. And white flipflops? You're the only woman on Earth who could rock that.

I can't wait to see you too. I Tivo'd the Bank Holiday specials so far, we need to watch them together once we get back from Nice.

<3, Emma very-soon-to-be Tennant


from: Bethany Edwards
to: Emma Harger
It's okay, we can go out and get smashed after the spa day. Pedicures and shots, sounds like my kind of day!

And I totally wore white flipflops to my high school graduation. How people didn't realize I was queer back then is way beyond me.


from: Emma Harger
to: Bethany Edwards
Pedis and shots! Just don't get TOO smashed, I don't want hungover bridesmaids. Please be able to walk a straight line down the aisle.

Please. At my graduation, all the girls wore little strappy open-toed shoes. It's hot Georgia in the summer and we're in hot polyester robes, what else can be done? I think I wore my Birkenstocks. What? They're comfortable!


from: Bethany Edwards
to: Emma Harger
Honey, using the word "straight" to describe anything I do would be a misnomer ;)

Birkenstocks, you hippy! It's okay, I hung out with a bunch of pot-smoking vegans.

It was somewhere in the high 80s (hot for Massachusetts in June) and torrential downpours on the night of my graduation. That was fun.


from: Emma Harger
to: Bethany Edwards
Ah, you know what I mean. Please retain the ability to walk a line that is not wibbly-wobbly. Or timey-wimey.

Birkenstocks are mad comfortable. Mine are falling apart, but I've had them since high school and I'm 29 now, so that's a pretty long time for shoes.

Let's see, late May, it was about 87, humid enough to curl paper (let alone hair), and the A/C was set to subzero at the GWCC (Georgia World Congress Center)...the classic paradox of Georgia summers. I don't know how people inhabited the South before air conditioning
Comments 
Saturday, July 26th, 2008 at 1:14 am (UTC)
I do think I've seen this before, but I still like it. I love when Bethany goes off on her tangent about chainsaws.
Saturday, July 26th, 2008 at 1:15 am (UTC)
My brain works in weird ways.
Tuesday, July 29th, 2008 at 1:43 am (UTC)
*laughing ass off* I'M A PENGUIN! That is awesome!

*waddles around with Paul the Penguin on her shoulder*
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